Thursday, June 29, 2006
yooooohooooo.
went to school today.
zz.
colour sucks can.
COLOUR is the subject we taking for this block.
omtian.
can die.
zzz.
have to paint something we see from magazines.
ZZZ.
okay.
ComDI was... alright.
AIYO.
nothing to say about school la.
lol.
nancy says we can stay at home and do our painting tmr.
but i'm coming to school at about ten plus 11 maybe.
hahas.
i hardworking =)
and nancy said in class today..
"drinking cold drinks in the morning is not good for health"
she meant me.
and then just nice i sneezed.
and she goes, " see what did i tell you?"
UHHH.
i sneezed cause i'm COLD?
LOL.
bitch.
HAHA.
tmr FRIDAY.
aiyo.
sian.
LOL
have to present ComDI.
we went Singapore Art Museum [S.A.M] ytd.
supposed to choose an exhibit which you think expresses your personality the most.
ZZZ.
its all.... the theme type artworks there.
like about poverty, war, blah blah kinda things.
how to write about how it expresses my personality?!?!
uhhh.
tough.
so i cracking my brain now.
trying to think of ways to ELABORATE the painting.
BAH.
me_________`e-leen *
8:07 PM
Monday, June 26, 2006
school starts TODAY!
well.
for most people.
mine starts tmr.
lol.
lets see.
was awaken by ALOT of smses today.
urgh.
so noisy.
lol.
went to interchange.
met kerli.
went bugis.
bought PMK top.
saw a VERY NICE top in 77th street.
no money buy.
SUPER SAD.
=(
who wanna sponsor?
lol.
$26+.
not very ex.
wahahah.
jkjk.
hmm.
went to 492 court.
sigh.
TRIED to talk to them.
gave up.
i don't know what to do anymore.
it's funny how two hands can spin so fast
despite trying to hang on the past
somewhere in my history i still can see
that happy girl i used to be
a circular path with dots and numbers
a sound that goes tick tock
i wan to move back to one pm
yet i'm stuck in this lonely clock
with pictures evoking with memories
my eyes feel wet and sour
now i finally realised when we were together
was the best moment every hour
a normal place, a normal void deck
is filled with our laughter
now there is no sound of the bouncing ball
my tears i try 2 cover
there was a time when we were fooling around
a time when we were united
now that lonely void deck leaves not a soul
because we're separated
kerli composed it.
felt my heart breaking.
some people might think we are over-reacting.
try losing a close friend.
then you come back to this blog.
we lost about FIVE close friends.
heart-pain.
i have nothing to say.
i did everything i could.
to TRY and salvage our friendship with them
but...
maybe...
they just DON'T want us as friends anymore.
is it time to move on?
i don't want to.
and now school's starting again.
maybe its better this way.
i'll be busy.
and i wont have to think so much.
yea.
maybe.
i think i have never been so emotional in my entire life before.
seriously.
ask abby.
ask ele.
i think.
last time.
whenever i'm with them.
i talked about 492 people.
those guys.
how they brought joy into my life.
how they never fail to make me laugh.
how much i enjoy their company.
but now.
.
.
.
i dont know what to think anymore.
i typed out this message i meant to send one of them.
the one i'm CLOSEST to.
its 3 FULL pages long.
but i have not send it yet.
i saved it in my phone.
maybe.... i might need to send it soon.
about this issue.
sigh.
don't bother cheering me up guys.
no use.
but thanks for all of your support.
and please dont go this happens all the time.
it don't.
its really more complicated than what i've tagged.
so yea.
thanks guys.
me_________`e-leen *
9:38 PM
Friday, June 23, 2006
time for updates issit??
lol
i'm a very busy person wad.
cannot blame me.
19,20,21 june - CHALET at downtown east.
one word. ROCKS.
but. alot of times happened.
ALOT.
we caught alot of "fishes"
got some daiji.
some ppl got beaten.
we made alot of new frens.
hmm.
basically. i love this few days.
hmm.
can i dun blog everything?
lol.
all i know is.
i made some really great frens.
i met some really irritating ppl.
and.
i confiscated 3 pen-knifes.
lol.
and i'm not planning to return.
buahahaha.
okay. i shall see when i free.
MAYBE i'll blog in details about the chalet.
MAYBE only hor. lol.
me_________`e-leen *
5:22 PM
Saturday, June 10, 2006
------------SEPTEMBER BABY ---------------
Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand.
ahaha.
so damn damn true.
Active and dynamic. // please. i'm super dramatic. well. for those ppl who know me well enough. heh.
Decisive and haste but tends to regret. // uh-huh. i regret doing alot of things. haha. too rash.
Attractive and affectionate to oneself. // i LOVE myself. Haha
Strong mentality. // you can't change my idea of something once i made up my mind about it.
Loves attention. // HAHA! XD.
Diplomatic. // its a nicer word for talkative. XD
Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. // ooooh yes. i'm good at this please.
Brave and fearless. Adventurous. // fearless. haha.. i'm almost crazy enough to do anything. well. ALMOST. lol.
Loving and caring. // for those who don't know me. yea i am. XD
Suave and generous. // i AM okay. haha.
Usually you have many friends. // read. its USUALLY. muahahs
Enjoys to make love. // NO COMMENTS. LOL!!
Emotional. // yea i am. but no one really seen my emotional side.
Stubborn. Hasty. // sometimes i can be VERY stubborn. heh.
Good memory. //err. observant yes. good memory. so-so?
Moving, motivates oneself and others. //yea. i like to motivate people.
Loves to travel and explore. // hahah. no one wants to go on a night-walk in school with me.
Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. // NO COMMENTS. haha. i don't understand this myself. LOL.
wooohooo. a nice sat.
and i'm bored as usual.
pfft.
was supposed to go see the bike stunt convection thingy.
but couldn't find anyone to go with me.
AS USUAL.
=(
so didn't go.
oh well.
i realised i never did post much pictures on my blog before.
so i shall post some today.
XD.
here you go.
me and kerli. on our way to bugis in the mrt. XD
uhh.
actually wanted to post more pictures.
BUT.
i think blogger is experiencing some problems.
they only let me post one pic. =(
though they stated they posted the rest.
the pics didn't come out.
only this.
soooo.
TOO BAD.
LOL.
me_________`e-leen *
9:52 PM
Thursday, June 08, 2006
went to bugis with kerli ytd.
saw this very nice and elegant top at Blossomz.
particularly not my type.
lol but i bought it anyway.
not enough money.
so i reserved it first.
haha.
got discount.
cause i said i'm jiajia's friends.
XD.
well.... i am.
HAH.
anyway.
told my dad about that cute black dress i saw in This Fashion.
yay. he gave me money for that.
and the top.
woohoo.
went to bugis again today.
collect the top.
gonna wear tmr.
when we go bugis.
AGAIN.
zz.
bought that dress too.
SO HAPPY!
i love that dress.
so cute please. XD
yay.
tmr girls bonding.
heh.
// -
kinda felt lonely again today.
cheryl dua me today.
so freaking sad + angry.
sat at tamps interchange small mac from 3.
sat until 3.15pm.
cannot jio anyone out.
meetin kerli at 4.30pm.
but i dun wanna wait at interchange for so long.
decided to walk from interchange to 492.
since i have so much time.
then it started drizzling.
yay. rain.
walked in the rain.
all the way from interchange to 492.
don't care if ppl stared at me.
i like the feeling of the rain on me.
i love walking in the rain.
reached 492 at about 3.45 - 4pm.
that means i walked for 30 mins.
cool.
hahah.
jiaxin they all there.
lucky.
if not i'll have to sit at the RC alone.
when to buy fries with jiaxin.
saw weilun at PC zone.
so happy to see him.
sigh.
miss that gang.
waited for kerli.
yea.
then headed down to bugis.
the rest you know.
me_________`e-leen *
10:34 PM
Monday, June 05, 2006
went to find kerli today.
met at tampines interchange.
went to tm.
walked walked.
shopped shopped.
talked talked.
went to RC.
the whole place seems super empty now.
was kinda sad.
kerli believes we can change everything.
well.
we did our part.
its time for them to do their part.
there's nothing more i can do.
kerli told me to close my eyes.
and visualised the past.
i don't need to close my eyes to do that.
the memories flow into my head like water.
and i didn't WANT to close my eyes.
so what if i see the happy past?
when i open my eyes i see the empty place.
i'll feel worse.
and i did feel worse.
kerli and i.
we felt.
no.
we knew.
we lost them.
i cried.
she almost cried.
sigh.
forget it.
its not gonna help.
i'm gonna give up soon.
me_________`e-leen *
9:44 PM
Sunday, June 04, 2006
went to esplanade last night.
went to watch those guys ride.
those guys?
erm okay i shall just name those i know.
HAHA.
cause there's alot more i don't know.
hmm.
//riders: weibin.lucas.jonathan.raymond.
did i left anyone out?
hmm.
okay that's about the people i know i think.
they were cool. XD.
hmm.
cheryl came to join me also.
after her video.
haha.
oh. and sion kor came to pass me some stuffs.
my kor so nice.
he bought so many things for me.
and now he's still wanna paid for my speakers.
=) i love my kor!!
hahahs.
okay.
yesterday was alright.
better than staying at home to rot.
and think all those funny stuffs.
HAHA.
and better than driving myself nuts.
okay i officially love Esplanade.
as a ARTS student.
and its a good place to CHILLLLL.
hahahas. right cheesecake? XD
love that place.
rocks.
nice quiet place.
=)
and love that corridor.
so colorful.
hahah. =)
//edits:
i'm feeling down enough.
if you don't have anything nice to say.
don't say.
even though you ARE kidding.
but ya.
i'm feeling bad enough.
and you are not helping me much.
stop please. stop.
anyway.
i know alot of people have been asking about me recently.
and sorry to all of those whom i've said i'm fine to.
i lied.
i'm really not fine.
but its not that i don't wanna share with you guys.
just that... i feel more dependent on my CLOSE friends.
and my cousin.
and i don't really see the point in telling you guys.
because you guys won't understand.
probably because you all are GUYS.
oh just maybe cause my stuffs are too complicated.
and only my close friends know what's going on.
cause i constantly update them.
so ya.
i know you guys care.
but please understand.
sometimes i can't share stuffs with you guys.
seriously.
you all won't understand much.
and it IS kinda complicated.
some stuffs are really the kind..
that i can only share with another girl.
not matter how nice you guys are.
or how sensitive you guys can be.
GUYS are, and will forever be GUYS.
all i can do..
is try to regain some of my older self last time.
and make myself look alright.
so please. understand guys.
i know some of you might think..
i don't treat you all like friends.
so i'm not telling you guys stuffs.
its not true k.
even my mom don't know what's going on.
she just asked my cousin.
if i have had a boyfriend.
cuz my mom thinks i'm acting weird this few days.
i don't deny i'm not.
because i'm also not sure.
what's happening to me and why.
and i'm trying to find out the answers.
so bear with me guys.
and soon.
the old cheerful and bubbly eileen will be back.
i hope.
and hope for me too.
i don't wanna stay this way.
its too much for me to bear as well.
so.
help me.
ALL OF YOU.
love you all.
<3
me_________`e-leen *
5:11 PM
Saturday, June 03, 2006
from abby to eileen,
i know you often get upset and emotional.
i know sometimes you get angry wimme over trivial stuff.
but nevertheless you ARE my best friend and that says alot
no one can ever replace how much you mean to me.
no one can understand the things we go through.
but as different as we are, i still love u.
indeed we've off & on been on the bad side of one another
indeed we've had many misunderstandings lately.
but i will never ever want you to change who u are.
sometimes we don't see things thru another's eyes.
sometimes we don't realise the things we do.
but i'm happy that you're always there for me - to pull me through.
whenever you're feeling down just gimme a call and i'll hear you out
whenever you want to cry, just let it out & i'll cry alongside you.
but sometimes i just cannot be where you are but i'll definately try.
if ever you feel like i've done you wrong.
if ever you feel that i wasn't fair.
just tell me and i'll change.
that's what friends are for.
that's what i'm here for.
to tell you your faults and vice versa.
i truly treasure you with all my heart.
you're simply the best. LOVE YOU TONS AND TONS AND TONS MORE
*hugs* don't be sad. i'll be your reason to smile.
i know this is a crappy post lah but haha i'm NOT good with words!
eileen dear, i'm sorry for the misunderstanding yesterday and everything.
i explained to you already and i hope you see things from my point of view.
i assumed stuff and you as well. we'll go out. i promise. wherever u wanna go.
<3
me_________`e-leen *
4:13 PM
Thursday, June 01, 2006
------------------------------
*you are not here for me.
when i needed you*
me_________`e-leen *
5:05 PM
yooooohooooo.
went to school today.
zz.
colour sucks can.
COLOUR is the subject we taking for this block.
omtian.
can die.
zzz.
have to paint something we see from magazines.
ZZZ.
okay.
ComDI was... alright.
AIYO.
nothing to say about school la.
lol.
nancy says we can stay at home and do our painting tmr.
but i'm coming to school at about ten plus 11 maybe.
hahas.
i hardworking =)
and nancy said in class today..
"drinking cold drinks in the morning is not good for health"
she meant me.
and then just nice i sneezed.
and she goes, " see what did i tell you?"
UHHH.
i sneezed cause i'm COLD?
LOL.
bitch.
HAHA.
tmr FRIDAY.
aiyo.
sian.
LOL
have to present ComDI.
we went Singapore Art Museum [S.A.M] ytd.
supposed to choose an exhibit which you think expresses your personality the most.
ZZZ.
its all.... the theme type artworks there.
like about poverty, war, blah blah kinda things.
how to write about how it expresses my personality?!?!
uhhh.
tough.
so i cracking my brain now.
trying to think of ways to ELABORATE the painting.
BAH.
me_________`e-leen *
8:07 PM
Monday, June 26, 2006
school starts TODAY!
well.
for most people.
mine starts tmr.
lol.
lets see.
was awaken by ALOT of smses today.
urgh.
so noisy.
lol.
went to interchange.
met kerli.
went bugis.
bought PMK top.
saw a VERY NICE top in 77th street.
no money buy.
SUPER SAD.
=(
who wanna sponsor?
lol.
$26+.
not very ex.
wahahah.
jkjk.
hmm.
went to 492 court.
sigh.
TRIED to talk to them.
gave up.
i don't know what to do anymore.
it's funny how two hands can spin so fast
despite trying to hang on the past
somewhere in my history i still can see
that happy girl i used to be
a circular path with dots and numbers
a sound that goes tick tock
i wan to move back to one pm
yet i'm stuck in this lonely clock
with pictures evoking with memories
my eyes feel wet and sour
now i finally realised when we were together
was the best moment every hour
a normal place, a normal void deck
is filled with our laughter
now there is no sound of the bouncing ball
my tears i try 2 cover
there was a time when we were fooling around
a time when we were united
now that lonely void deck leaves not a soul
because we're separated
kerli composed it.
felt my heart breaking.
some people might think we are over-reacting.
try losing a close friend.
then you come back to this blog.
we lost about FIVE close friends.
heart-pain.
i have nothing to say.
i did everything i could.
to TRY and salvage our friendship with them
but...
maybe...
they just DON'T want us as friends anymore.
is it time to move on?
i don't want to.
and now school's starting again.
maybe its better this way.
i'll be busy.
and i wont have to think so much.
yea.
maybe.
i think i have never been so emotional in my entire life before.
seriously.
ask abby.
ask ele.
i think.
last time.
whenever i'm with them.
i talked about 492 people.
those guys.
how they brought joy into my life.
how they never fail to make me laugh.
how much i enjoy their company.
but now.
.
.
.
i dont know what to think anymore.
i typed out this message i meant to send one of them.
the one i'm CLOSEST to.
its 3 FULL pages long.
but i have not send it yet.
i saved it in my phone.
maybe.... i might need to send it soon.
about this issue.
sigh.
don't bother cheering me up guys.
no use.
but thanks for all of your support.
and please dont go this happens all the time.
it don't.
its really more complicated than what i've tagged.
so yea.
thanks guys.
me_________`e-leen *
9:38 PM
Friday, June 23, 2006
time for updates issit??
lol
i'm a very busy person wad.
cannot blame me.
19,20,21 june - CHALET at downtown east.
one word. ROCKS.
but. alot of times happened.
ALOT.
we caught alot of "fishes"
got some daiji.
some ppl got beaten.
we made alot of new frens.
hmm.
basically. i love this few days.
hmm.
can i dun blog everything?
lol.
all i know is.
i made some really great frens.
i met some really irritating ppl.
and.
i confiscated 3 pen-knifes.
lol.
and i'm not planning to return.
buahahaha.
okay. i shall see when i free.
MAYBE i'll blog in details about the chalet.
MAYBE only hor. lol.
me_________`e-leen *
5:22 PM
Saturday, June 10, 2006
------------SEPTEMBER BABY ---------------
Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand.
ahaha.
so damn damn true.
Active and dynamic. // please. i'm super dramatic. well. for those ppl who know me well enough. heh.
Decisive and haste but tends to regret. // uh-huh. i regret doing alot of things. haha. too rash.
Attractive and affectionate to oneself. // i LOVE myself. Haha
Strong mentality. // you can't change my idea of something once i made up my mind about it.
Loves attention. // HAHA! XD.
Diplomatic. // its a nicer word for talkative. XD
Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. // ooooh yes. i'm good at this please.
Brave and fearless. Adventurous. // fearless. haha.. i'm almost crazy enough to do anything. well. ALMOST. lol.
Loving and caring. // for those who don't know me. yea i am. XD
Suave and generous. // i AM okay. haha.
Usually you have many friends. // read. its USUALLY. muahahs
Enjoys to make love. // NO COMMENTS. LOL!!
Emotional. // yea i am. but no one really seen my emotional side.
Stubborn. Hasty. // sometimes i can be VERY stubborn. heh.
Good memory. //err. observant yes. good memory. so-so?
Moving, motivates oneself and others. //yea. i like to motivate people.
Loves to travel and explore. // hahah. no one wants to go on a night-walk in school with me.
Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. // NO COMMENTS. haha. i don't understand this myself. LOL.
wooohooo. a nice sat.
and i'm bored as usual.
pfft.
was supposed to go see the bike stunt convection thingy.
but couldn't find anyone to go with me.
AS USUAL.
=(
so didn't go.
oh well.
i realised i never did post much pictures on my blog before.
so i shall post some today.
XD.
here you go.
me and kerli. on our way to bugis in the mrt. XD
uhh.
actually wanted to post more pictures.
BUT.
i think blogger is experiencing some problems.
they only let me post one pic. =(
though they stated they posted the rest.
the pics didn't come out.
only this.
soooo.
TOO BAD.
LOL.
.0.jpg){kind=link}
me_________`e-leen *
9:52 PM
Thursday, June 08, 2006
went to bugis with kerli ytd.
saw this very nice and elegant top at Blossomz.
particularly not my type.
lol but i bought it anyway.
not enough money.
so i reserved it first.
haha.
got discount.
cause i said i'm jiajia's friends.
XD.
well.... i am.
HAH.
anyway.
told my dad about that cute black dress i saw in This Fashion.
yay. he gave me money for that.
and the top.
woohoo.
went to bugis again today.
collect the top.
gonna wear tmr.
when we go bugis.
AGAIN.
zz.
bought that dress too.
SO HAPPY!
i love that dress.
so cute please. XD
yay.
tmr girls bonding.
heh.
// -
kinda felt lonely again today.
cheryl dua me today.
so freaking sad + angry.
sat at tamps interchange small mac from 3.
sat until 3.15pm.
cannot jio anyone out.
meetin kerli at 4.30pm.
but i dun wanna wait at interchange for so long.
decided to walk from interchange to 492.
since i have so much time.
then it started drizzling.
yay. rain.
walked in the rain.
all the way from interchange to 492.
don't care if ppl stared at me.
i like the feeling of the rain on me.
i love walking in the rain.
reached 492 at about 3.45 - 4pm.
that means i walked for 30 mins.
cool.
hahah.
jiaxin they all there.
lucky.
if not i'll have to sit at the RC alone.
when to buy fries with jiaxin.
saw weilun at PC zone.
so happy to see him.
sigh.
miss that gang.
waited for kerli.
yea.
then headed down to bugis.
the rest you know.
me_________`e-leen *
10:34 PM
Monday, June 05, 2006
went to find kerli today.
met at tampines interchange.
went to tm.
walked walked.
shopped shopped.
talked talked.
went to RC.
the whole place seems super empty now.
was kinda sad.
kerli believes we can change everything.
well.
we did our part.
its time for them to do their part.
there's nothing more i can do.
kerli told me to close my eyes.
and visualised the past.
i don't need to close my eyes to do that.
the memories flow into my head like water.
and i didn't WANT to close my eyes.
so what if i see the happy past?
when i open my eyes i see the empty place.
i'll feel worse.
and i did feel worse.
kerli and i.
we felt.
no.
we knew.
we lost them.
i cried.
she almost cried.
sigh.
forget it.
its not gonna help.
i'm gonna give up soon.
me_________`e-leen *
9:44 PM
Sunday, June 04, 2006
went to esplanade last night.
went to watch those guys ride.
those guys?
erm okay i shall just name those i know.
HAHA.
cause there's alot more i don't know.
hmm.
//riders: weibin.lucas.jonathan.raymond.
did i left anyone out?
hmm.
okay that's about the people i know i think.
they were cool. XD.
hmm.
cheryl came to join me also.
after her video.
haha.
oh. and sion kor came to pass me some stuffs.
my kor so nice.
he bought so many things for me.
and now he's still wanna paid for my speakers.
=) i love my kor!!
hahahs.
okay.
yesterday was alright.
better than staying at home to rot.
and think all those funny stuffs.
HAHA.
and better than driving myself nuts.
okay i officially love Esplanade.
as a ARTS student.
and its a good place to CHILLLLL.
hahahas. right cheesecake? XD
love that place.
rocks.
nice quiet place.
=)
and love that corridor.
so colorful.
hahah. =)
//edits:
i'm feeling down enough.
if you don't have anything nice to say.
don't say.
even though you ARE kidding.
but ya.
i'm feeling bad enough.
and you are not helping me much.
stop please. stop.
anyway.
i know alot of people have been asking about me recently.
and sorry to all of those whom i've said i'm fine to.
i lied.
i'm really not fine.
but its not that i don't wanna share with you guys.
just that... i feel more dependent on my CLOSE friends.
and my cousin.
and i don't really see the point in telling you guys.
because you guys won't understand.
probably because you all are GUYS.
oh just maybe cause my stuffs are too complicated.
and only my close friends know what's going on.
cause i constantly update them.
so ya.
i know you guys care.
but please understand.
sometimes i can't share stuffs with you guys.
seriously.
you all won't understand much.
and it IS kinda complicated.
some stuffs are really the kind..
that i can only share with another girl.
not matter how nice you guys are.
or how sensitive you guys can be.
GUYS are, and will forever be GUYS.
all i can do..
is try to regain some of my older self last time.
and make myself look alright.
so please. understand guys.
i know some of you might think..
i don't treat you all like friends.
so i'm not telling you guys stuffs.
its not true k.
even my mom don't know what's going on.
she just asked my cousin.
if i have had a boyfriend.
cuz my mom thinks i'm acting weird this few days.
i don't deny i'm not.
because i'm also not sure.
what's happening to me and why.
and i'm trying to find out the answers.
so bear with me guys.
and soon.
the old cheerful and bubbly eileen will be back.
i hope.
and hope for me too.
i don't wanna stay this way.
its too much for me to bear as well.
so.
help me.
ALL OF YOU.
love you all.
<3
me_________`e-leen *
5:11 PM
Saturday, June 03, 2006
from abby to eileen,
i know you often get upset and emotional.
i know sometimes you get angry wimme over trivial stuff.
but nevertheless you ARE my best friend and that says alot
no one can ever replace how much you mean to me.
no one can understand the things we go through.
but as different as we are, i still love u.
indeed we've off & on been on the bad side of one another
indeed we've had many misunderstandings lately.
but i will never ever want you to change who u are.
sometimes we don't see things thru another's eyes.
sometimes we don't realise the things we do.
but i'm happy that you're always there for me - to pull me through.
whenever you're feeling down just gimme a call and i'll hear you out
whenever you want to cry, just let it out & i'll cry alongside you.
but sometimes i just cannot be where you are but i'll definately try.
if ever you feel like i've done you wrong.
if ever you feel that i wasn't fair.
just tell me and i'll change.
that's what friends are for.
that's what i'm here for.
to tell you your faults and vice versa.
i truly treasure you with all my heart.
you're simply the best. LOVE YOU TONS AND TONS AND TONS MORE
*hugs* don't be sad. i'll be your reason to smile.
i know this is a crappy post lah but haha i'm NOT good with words!
eileen dear, i'm sorry for the misunderstanding yesterday and everything.
i explained to you already and i hope you see things from my point of view.
i assumed stuff and you as well. we'll go out. i promise. wherever u wanna go.
<3
me_________`e-leen *
4:13 PM
Thursday, June 01, 2006
i'm feeling so god damn fucking lonely.
i feel like dying.
loneliness is the last thing i can bear now.
fuck it.
talked to azli and deb last night till early morn.
thanks dears.
was feeling pretty upset last night.
weibin and his friends
THANK YOU so much.
they made me laugh so much last night.
=) .
oh we had a mass convo.
HAHA.
thanks guys.
really.
though i only knew weibin.
the rest of you cheered me up.
ALOT.
woke up today at 2.30pm.
actually woke at 11am.
went back to sleep.
i rather sleep to face the loneliness.
but i just can't sleep anymore at 2pm.
woke up.
alone at home as usual.
sis and bro went school.
mom went work.
ate lunch.
bathed.
sat and stoned.
called and msged alot of ppl.
as usual all not free.
`abby. grounded.
`ele. school + training.
`cheryl. zoo and won't be back till 8.
`kerli. phone off.
wanted to call eliz.
but lost her no. when i lost my phone.
suddenly felt SUPER FUCKING lonely.
cried and cried.
felt like i was alone.
tried to stop crying
went to the toilet.
filled a large pail with water.
dunked my head in it.
felt good.
cause i don't know de water on my face is from the water in the pail,
or my tears.
best.
my hair is now wet.
dried it abit.
checked my wallet.
$6.
decided to go down to de market to buy some food to gorge myself.
bought $2 worth of crackers.
bought strawberry green tea.
bought kinder brueno.
went home.
YES!
I FOUND A FUCKING BOOK TO READ.
A series of Unfortunate Events.
Series 12.
The Penultimate Peril.
YES!
you saved my lonely life, book.
thanks.
okay.
i shall end my lonely miserable life here.
and go read the LOVELY book that saved my LONELY life.
while eating my crackers and drinkin my strawberry green tea.
with the laptop playing chinese emo songs,
like Wang Li Hom's Ni Bu Zai.
ahhh.
bye.
//edit: time - 5.38pm.
yay. my sis is home.
DAMN.
she just took half my kinder brueno. -.-
//edit: time - 6.28pm.
finished the book.
WTH?
so fast.
nvm. my sis and mom are home.
yay. shall turn of the com after the last emo song.
i love this song man.
Ni Bu Zai. -by Wang Li Hom.-
ROCKS.
hmm. shall go out watch tv after this.
er shit.
i ate so much crackers that i think i'll be too full for dinner.
HAHA.
nvm i'll eat at a later time.
mom cooked one of my favourite soup. -potato and corn-
ohh damn.
this song so emooooooo.
i feel like dying.
loneliness is the last thing i can bear now.
fuck it.
talked to azli and deb last night till early morn.
thanks dears.
was feeling pretty upset last night.
weibin and his friends
THANK YOU so much.
they made me laugh so much last night.
=) .
oh we had a mass convo.
HAHA.
thanks guys.
really.
though i only knew weibin.
the rest of you cheered me up.
ALOT.
woke up today at 2.30pm.
actually woke at 11am.
went back to sleep.
i rather sleep to face the loneliness.
but i just can't sleep anymore at 2pm.
woke up.
alone at home as usual.
sis and bro went school.
mom went work.
ate lunch.
bathed.
sat and stoned.
called and msged alot of ppl.
as usual all not free.
`abby. grounded.
`ele. school + training.
`cheryl. zoo and won't be back till 8.
`kerli. phone off.
wanted to call eliz.
but lost her no. when i lost my phone.
suddenly felt SUPER FUCKING lonely.
cried and cried.
felt like i was alone.
tried to stop crying
went to the toilet.
filled a large pail with water.
dunked my head in it.
felt good.
cause i don't know de water on my face is from the water in the pail,
or my tears.
best.
my hair is now wet.
dried it abit.
checked my wallet.
$6.
decided to go down to de market to buy some food to gorge myself.
bought $2 worth of crackers.
bought strawberry green tea.
bought kinder brueno.
went home.
YES!
I FOUND A FUCKING BOOK TO READ.
A series of Unfortunate Events.
Series 12.
The Penultimate Peril.
YES!
you saved my lonely life, book.
thanks.
okay.
i shall end my lonely miserable life here.
and go read the LOVELY book that saved my LONELY life.
while eating my crackers and drinkin my strawberry green tea.
with the laptop playing chinese emo songs,
like Wang Li Hom's Ni Bu Zai.
ahhh.
bye.
//edit: time - 5.38pm.
yay. my sis is home.
DAMN.
she just took half my kinder brueno. -.-
//edit: time - 6.28pm.
finished the book.
WTH?
so fast.
nvm. my sis and mom are home.
yay. shall turn of the com after the last emo song.
i love this song man.
Ni Bu Zai. -by Wang Li Hom.-
ROCKS.
hmm. shall go out watch tv after this.
er shit.
i ate so much crackers that i think i'll be too full for dinner.
HAHA.
nvm i'll eat at a later time.
mom cooked one of my favourite soup. -potato and corn-
ohh damn.
this song so emooooooo.
你不在 - 王力宏
当世界只剩下这床头灯
你那边是早晨已经出门
我侧身感到你在转身
无数陌生人正在等下一个绿灯
一再错身彼此脆弱的时分
如果渴望一个吻的余温
我关了灯黑暗把我拼吞
你不在
当我最需要爱
你却不在
无尽等待像独白般难挨
你不在高兴还是悲哀
你都不在
我受了伤在偷偷好起来
但你不在
不在
时间再按下许多次快门
沉默里听见转动的秒针
一个人吃饭这个凌晨
孤单一人份
你低声说你有别人
我的话筒只有自己的体温
怎样认真也不一定成真
你说的对
我不得不承认
你不在
当我最需要爱
你却不在
无尽等待像独白的难挨
你不在
高兴还是悲哀
你都不在
我受了伤再偷偷好起来
但你不在
那些摇摆
我都明白
都明白
但你不在
爱已不在
不在
你不在
当我最需要爱
你却不在
一个人分饰两角的恋爱
你不在
高兴还是悲哀
你都不在
像空气般不存在的存在
再没有痕迹的爱你不在
当我需要你的爱你不在
------------------------------
*you are not here for me.
when i needed you*
me_________`e-leen *
5:05 PM